She's never the same. Maybe that's why I like her so much. She is well-travelled and fearless. Like all of us, she has her rough days. Sometimes she is aggressive, green with envy, and even straight up salty. She is a constant in my life and for that I am so grateful. She has given me more than she will ever know. She's larger than life, in the best way possible, yet I cannot imagine how hard it is to be her. I'm sure that deep down, she holds both the best of life and the worst of death. I will never push her away, because she has never pushed me. Though I only see her once a year, she continually grounds me and gives me the serenity I need to move onward. It's a needed reset after the chaos of each school year. Her presence instantly washes away the stresses associated with crowded hallways and rambling teachers. When I feel that my brain is full, she helps me sort through the clutter to preserve the wisdom. When I think of sweltering summer days, I think of our time spent together. I always fear that she will have changed and that I will feel differently about her, yet each time we meet, she waves and I run to her. Her skin is still golden and her hair remains sandy blonde. It glows under the moon during our late night walks. Her eyes change in every light but to a stranger would appear the most basic of blues. I see them as everything from a piercing, icy blue to a vengeful black. She will never know her full impact on my life. I usually arrive with a suitcase of clothes but return with a renewed sense of self. My gratitude allows me to better appreciate the constants in my life, like the relationships that I have built with the people that matter most. Her gift of friendship isn't one to be taken lightly, and while everyone is drawn to her, including me, I never expected to be so grateful for her. The depth of our relationship is terrifying yet calming. Something about her will always make me feel small, but I don't hold that against her. It's my own insecurities that cause those feelings of inadequacy. She offers me not only unconditional friendship but also hope for the future. Most people think that she's quiet, but they have never stopped to listen. I spend every harsh winter anticipating our next embrace. When I am with her, she pushes me forward, challenging me to be the best possible version of myself. Our friendship reminds me to treat myself with the same grace with which I treat others. Who knows, one day I may be as perfectly imperfect as her. Each year, the goodbye gets harder. I never expect it to get easier. I know she was here long before I arrived and will be here long after I leave. We don't talk often enough, but when we do I try to focus on the good and appreciate the life lessons she teaches me. She lives such a public life that everyone knows her. Yes, some people know her better than me, but that's okay. She can give everyone she meets a gift, but it is what one does with the gift that matters most. Her gift to me is a sense of permanence, peace, and perspective. I use it as a guide for self-forgiveness and self-confidence. When talking about her, I typically do not like to reveal her name. However, I feel compelled to share her identity because without knowing her, you won't truly know me. As E.E. Cummings wrote; "For whatever we lose (like a you or a me), it's always our self we find in the sea." She is the Ocean, my forever friend and soulmate.